How have you been lately?

I wish I had the courage to ask how's life for you. But I fear rejection and ignorance so much now. Where did my usual self disappeared to even sigh. You had your UT earlier on, i wished you goodluck and to takecare of yourself. It took me a long time just to press that send button. You replied a simple thanks with the smiley face emoji, it made me happy cos you replied. It felt like those days where we first started out. Getting all those butterflies in my tummy whenever i see your name lighting up on my phone. I wish you knew how much i love you, but my love for you is deep and meaningless. Today i watched pee mak. The ending was so touching, i cried so badly cos it reminded me of you. The sweet side of you. The words you once said to me. The way you cared for me. The way you got jealous. My heart is afraid of you falling for the other girls in your class cos you have a charismatic character. I can't help to feel this way. Other boys text me but i just don't have that interest to reply much cosy heart just starts thinking of you each time, and so i just pushed them away. I wish it was you who texted me instead. One simple text can also make my day. I love you idiot. Wish you all the luck for your UTs and do well. Don't ever give up on yourself. Don't smoke so much and get enough rest :')